Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) is an uncommon, serious condition where an infant is unable to form a healthy bond with their caregiver due to abuse, or neglect. This condition develops because the infant's basic needs are not being met hurting the ability to be able to form relationships with others in the future.
My father suffers from RAD. He was the 7th, and youngest, child born to a physically abusive father and a mother with severe postpartum depression. Through infancy he laid in a play pen for hours watching his rambunctious siblings tear through the house seemingly unaware of his existence. My father was the scapegoat for all that was wrong in the house as a child and his drunken father would beat him mercilessly for it.
He met my mom some time later, and when she found out she was pregnant with me they got married because "it was the right thing to do." My father has always been distant. Awkward. Anti-social. Aloof. Self-absorbed. He knew how to be a boy, but never a man. Never a father to me. In his defense, however, he had no idea what a "good" father looked like or acted. He just knew that by not physically and emotionally abusing my brothers' and me he was a better father than his own. And for that I am grateful.
With unlimited funds I would love to work with children suffering from RAD. Help them understand that not everyone is evil or depressed and broken. There is a light at the end of the tunnel and people out there who want to love you. It would heal my soul to help children like my father. To be an advocate for someone with such a small voice.
I am interested in this topic also, as I believe that my dad also suffers from RAD. He was the oldest of many siblings, but his mother was very distant with all of them and had a very similar upbringing to your dad.
ReplyDeleteI wonder if through therapy these children or adults can recover, or if it is permanent since their stages got screwed up.
I would also find it very rewarding to work with people how suffer from RAD or any impairment due to a insecure attachment, because there is always hope for them no matter what age. In the article we read this week about attachment suggested that human brains rewire themselves ever two years. This is amazing and very hopeful for people that do suffer from attachment issues. They may not be instantly cured but some improvements in the right direction could be made with time and would benefit the patient immensely.
ReplyDelete